Pop Country and Holdin' on tight

I listen to a lot of pop-country at work. The more I hear it, the more I think I understand.
For example, a popular ditty right now is "A Guy Walks Into A Bar" performed by Tyler Farr and written by Melissa Peirce, Brad Tursi, and Jonathan Singleton (possibly because Tyler Farr is a fake, phoney, piece of shit that sucked his way through Nashville... oh shit, that was mean wasn't it?).

This song is about a loser falling for a barfly, and "holding on tight." Why do I point that out? Because "holding on tight," is just as common in pop-country as mentions of whiskey, freedom, and trucks. What "hold on tight," means as far as I can tell, is that the singer is an abusive alcoholic and the love interest is supposed to take it for as long as they can, before they wise up and leave.

In nearly all of these songs, both people are abusive alcoholics, so they have to "hold on tight," to each other. If you ever grew up knowing "that couple," of white trash friends who shouldn't be together but stay together even though they hate each other and are constantly at each others throats....

... they're just holdin' on tight.

Because God forbid they stop being drunk idiots.

Also, this is one of the worst songs, of any genre, out right now. So fake, so cliche, so boring, so utterly full of shit. Just like this wanker's fans.

See for yourself!






Whoa! this is my first post here in a very long time! Maybe there will be more soon. Who knows?

Time for a new band

My first band was a short-lived (but long notorious) punk band called Third Trimester Abortion. My second band was a rap group (also notorious) called Hotsauce. We recorded, like, 30 songs. Ask, and I'll send you some. Third band was a country group that never got off the ground called, Kissin' Cousins. Kissin' Cousins had songs like, "You Crashed a Plane into the Twin Towers of My Heart," and, "She Left Me for our Son."

Now, I have determined the next band I start will be called, Moonwolf.

Moonwolf is a shitcore metal band that only plays covers of Xfactor1 and Bobaflex. Our band t-shirts are made from shirts we buy at Walmart and Goodwill that have wolves and Moons printed on them.

Try to come up with something better than that. I dare you.