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Tuesday, September 27, 2011

WNCI Playlist Part 1

A few weeks ago at my "real" job, we got a new General Manager. He's alright, but he keeps the radio on WNCI so I have to listen to the same 6 gonad-shriveling, soulless, songs every hour with themes and lyrics so banal and impotent that I place great doubt into the future of humanity.

This is Part 1 of an ongoing series.

The first is a song that I first thought was either a Japanese poptart debuting in the U.S. or a weird Alvin and The Chipmunks techno mash-up. I didn't really listen to the lyrics at first as I had more important things to do. When I did finally learn to understand the squeaky/robotic vocals I learned that the singer is indeed female, and just wants to fuck everything and everyone but feels so darn trapped due to the restraints society or her parents or whoever are putting on her.

I thought to myself, "Gee, didn't Britney Spears cover this bullshit ten years ago?"

I guess she still feels like she's supposed to be a Little Goody Two-Shoes after 2 kids, flashing her pussy, two failed marriages (one lasting a day), public intoxication, and... you get the drift.

She seems to have finally given up on pretending that she has a singing voice and gone over to the Autotune bandwagon. Why do pop singers even exist? There really only needs to be one singer who just sings on autotune and is remixed in to various songs created in the studio on a computer. Record companies would make a fortune, idiots would still have their favorite music, and jobless pop stars would go back to doing what they were born to do. In this case, have 8 kids from 7 different men, while sharing a mobile home with their sister and parents.

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